I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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