4 words: hood of his car
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
