either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
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