can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Small penises have feelings too.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
