no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
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