I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
