Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Randomize