Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
