Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
