I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
