He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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