I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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