May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
