your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Randomize
