i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
