it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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