The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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