bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize