where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
from now on my penis is your penis
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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