Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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