she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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