Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
where am i from again
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
