I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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