Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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