stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize