ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
