Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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