Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize
