You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
