You're completely useless in the revolution.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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