i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
