she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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