Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
