You work out of a Hotel?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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