Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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