JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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