The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize