I heard we made out
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
