Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
