He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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