It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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