he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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