I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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