Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
