i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
