Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
