I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
