i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize