yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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