Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
